It's true! I used to be a wedding planner!
I had a short stint as a wedding planner, which happened accidentally (long story), but was exciting for me because I've always loved the idea of weddings. Marriage, itself, I was never a fan of, but weddings were fun to me. Take out the traditional, sexist crap and what you've got left is a great celebration with people you love! What's not to like?!
My biggest problem with weddings isn't really the traditions. I was fortunate enough to deal with people who were very open-minded and forward-thinking. Most of them had unique weddings with personal touches and steered clear of the things people usually can't stand about weddings, especially giving the woman away. Most of them didn't leave all the planning to the woman, but instead shared the responsibilities. Most of them didn't worry about white dresses, lace, having the best of the best, and everything being perfect. Most of them just wanted a good time with their friends and family. My kind of people.
Nope, my problem isn't with the couples -- my biggest problem with weddings is the industry. The nature of my job was such that I had to push couples to spend more money. There were minimums to keep track of, upgrades to encourage, all sorts of loopholes and hidden fees. I hated it. Because when I wanted to be a wedding planner, I wanted to be the one finding ways to SAVE people money. I wanted to call companies out on their ridiculous prices and dirty tricks. (Tip #1 for everyone: do not say you are planning a wedding! Say it's a family gathering/event. It doesn't work with every company, but when it does, you'd be amazed at the difference it makes!)
So, needless to say, I didn't do very well at my job. Couples loved me, but I wasn't bringing enough money in to satisfy my superiors. And though I still like to help people with their weddings on my own and lead people down the money-saving, tradition-breaking path, I think things would be much easier for everyone if we could all encourage more anti-weddings.
Which is why I absolutely had to share this piece about a couple who planned an unconventional wedding at an unconventional price-tag. The anti-wedding planners worked with a couple to hold a protest, have a ceremony on the street, and host a reception at a pizza place. Read it because it's quite funny. I also hope it will inspire me to stop being lazy and start planning my own unconventional wedding.
For folks who've been married, what was your wedding like? For those who haven't, what are your wedding expectations? Is there such a thing as a feminist wedding? If so, what does it look like?